So it turns out that part of my make-up incompetence is the fact I have hooded eyelids so all the normal advice just doesn't quite...work.
(I found this video helpful in my "Oooooh...that makes sense" realisation)
Thing is, even this woman had a good inch of skin to daub colour on between her lashes and her eyebrow. My brows are so low that if I use good mascara, my lashes "catch" in the brow.
So, uh, now what?